September 19 2014, 02:38 PM

What you should know about TV Ratings

No one ever listens to me BUT herardentwish asked me how tv ratings work especially with the advent of DVR and people hopping online to watch more and more media content rather than sit in front of the television.

I mean essentially, tv ratings became a thing before you think. It was actually invented for radio broadcasts, then old dude Arthur Nielsen who was a marketing guy expanded that to television in the 50s. This was back when t.v. was the thing your family did as a group together after dinner for one hour.

ALSO not everyone even had a t.v. so it was easy to predict that if there were three channels to pick from, and maybe 1,000 people in your city had a television, what the percentage of viewers might be for a thing.

The stupid problem is that the formula hasn’t changed much, it’s just adjusted for how long we now spend watching t.v. on average, who watches (ethnically and age wise) and how many people have easy access to a television which is now millions of people. Except now millions of people are also like ‘fuck you’ to commercials.


So, advertisers pay money (a lot of it, that’s why the Superbowl is apparently more about the ads than the game) to say ‘We want our ad to run during this show because A LOT OF PEOPLE WATCH IT.’

It’s like in The Walking Dead, when we got this shot of walkers chowing down on a dead guy and then the first ad at the break was people chowing down on fried chicken.


And if your show does well, more expensive companies who have more money to throw at the network will hop on the dollar sign train and everyone is happy. What ruins everyone’s happy is less viewers which can be for a couple of reasons:

1) People just aren’t watching.

2) People are fast forwarding through commercials, therefore you never see the ad, which means sales don’t go up for that product, whatever it is.

3) People are watching on their computers.

So, about point 1:

Nielsen can’t actually give everyone the software to track what’s being watched, because as of 2013, approximately 115 MILLION people have a t.v. So, here’s what they do. Ratings will look like this:

Once Upon a Time - Live, Same day rating2.1/6.

That means that on average, 2.1% of everyone in the country with a television were at some point watching the show, and 6% watched for the entire hour solid.

A single point = 1.15 million households. So, that’s roughly 6 million people who watched it live. That’s a lot of people. When you get down into the 3-4 million mark, there’s a danger zone unless you’re say, on HBO where there is no advertising and the only risk is the company’s. But when people don’t watch, advertisers pull, the network loses money, the show gets canned. Thems the breaks. RIP, Happy Endings.

When you throw the DVR thing into the mix it gets even more complicated. You have to wait 7 days to even get those numbers. (Though some companies will only wait 3 days, which gives you some inaccuracy right there.)

Continuing to use Once Upon a Time as our example and the same episode, once the ‘plus seven’ days were added, that increased their numbers to 2.3/7. So, there is a notable difference. The problem is that when people are watching on their DVRs, advertisers aren’t making money, so if the ratings aren’t high on the live viewing, they start pulling out, the ratings drop, and that’s how good shows get cancelled. The difference in numbers can be so insignificant that statistically there’s no actual measurable difference between one show and the other, so it will literally come down to which show had the highest rating even if one show is 2.1 and the other is 2.2.

The problem with Nielsen is that, sure, it now rates DVR viewings too, but the sample sizes are small, and raters are still required to keep a diary. Yes, an ACTUAL diary and that is something I have been a part of. A diary that you actually write down what show you watched and at what time you watched it. My experience? Jesus, I don’t remember when I watched this thing on my DVR. I guess it was…three days ago around two in the morning?

That is 100% what the diary looks like.

(So really if you want to ‘boycott’ something you need two things: A Nielsen rating box and a DVR. If you don’t have both of those things, you are 100% wasting your time not watching a show.)

Point two was kind of covered in point 1, so moving on to point three:

There’s a reason Hulu has ads you can’t skip.

If they have advertisers, they can keep the price of being able to watch all this free content at a certain level because we’re seeing ads for say, Tide laundry detergent, and once we’re done with our New Girl binge watch, we want to smell like a summer spring day like Jess Day probably does. So we go out and buy that product.


Internet versions of television shows still don’t count in the ratings. STILL. IN 2013. Because the ads are either non-existent (Netflix) or there aren’t enough of them (Hulu), and remember - it’s all about $$$$$$$ 

The Money Train. (Or: A movie I didn’t know was real until 5 seconds ago.)

Just to give you an example of how times have changed?

I Love Lucy was once the highest rated comedy on television with an average of 43 million viewers per episode.

The highest rated comedy of the 2013 season was The Big Bang Theory with 19 million viewers per episode.

Congratulations, America. We’ve had a good run.

September 19 2014, 11:40 AM


Inspired by Baker’s Dozen.

I’m just… I’m just gonna sit here and make unintelligible noises.



Inspired by Baker’s Dozen.

I’m just… I’m just gonna sit here and make unintelligible noises.

September 19 2014, 10:50 AM
Prompts/Thoughts? 1) The potion that WW made at the end of NYC Serenade with Regina's blood as a key ingredient. What is it for? Why go through the entire scene with the flying monkey if the show won't explain it's purpose (obviously, to introduce Robin Hood!lol but aside from that!) 2) Magic ALWAYS comes with a price, but when Robin heals Marian with the BlackFairy's wand, what is it? 3) How the HELL did Rumple know that Robin has the heart? 4) How come Regina did not have children of her own?

1) Well, we know it wasn’t for the blood locks, since Zelena is blood (and that’s why she needed Rumple’s blood to get into his safe in SB therefore he can’t be her bio father), so it could have been for the curse? I mean all that we know is that Regina needed the heart of the thing she loved most. And we watched Henry!Pan toss in a few bottles of crap when he cast it. So maybe there needs to be blood? Maybe she needed it for a potion she never got to use in SB. Who even knows.

2) Pretty sure Marian dying anyway after she had Roland was the price. Which is why A) I won’t believe Regina killed her until I see it and B) Someone now has a new debt to pay because she’s alive again but I can’t decide if it’s Robin or Emma.

3) Zelena had 43243512 flying monkeys (well okay, maybe less) from the people she kidnapped in Storybrooke, also including Little John. She has eyes and ears everywhere so it’s plausible for me to just assume she figured it out that way. I mean, that was the whole point of the flying monkeys. Info gatherers/menial task do-ers.

4) Because she didn’t want them? Because time stood still for 28 years and she didn’t want to be like that poor sucker Cinderella? Because she possibly cursed herself when she knew how so that Leopold couldn’t get her pregnant? It could be any of those things.

September 19 2014, 10:45 AM
I think the reason why Snow had to "tell" David she was pregnant was because she was a month in or so. The one who was actually six months pregnant was Ginny. I loved seeing pregnant Ginny but tbh with how much CGI this show uses I'm a little surprised they didn't digitally slim down Snow so that Ginny's pregnancy wouldn't have been so obvious on-screen. Because "The Tower" and the first flashback of "A Curious Thing" are when Snow's still in her first trimester and Ginny obviously wasn't lol

I wonder if the time line would have been less shaky all around if Ginny hadn’t  been quite so pregnant, lol Because she went from 0 to 9 months in the EF but meanwhile AURORA STILL HASN’T HAD HER BABY. And she was pregnant before the curse ever hit and the SB people made it back to the EF, and according to A&E she’s STILL PREGNANT. 

She wasn’t a monkey for that long because Snow was already about to pop when Aurora got turned into one. OR WAS SHE?


September 19 2014, 10:42 AM
here I am, just innocently going about my kate business AND YOU GO AND MURDER MY SOUL WITH #can we talk about how she presses that ring to her lip because it’s all she has left of him to kiss? WHY WOULD YOU DO THAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT. people have mean tags. GROUND THEM WITH YOUR LANA POWER.

I could hardly see through my tears as I added someonethatiamnot's tags to that post. 


September 19 2014, 10:22 AM


Don’t trust Sydney Glass, it’s a mistake

Regina’s gonna let him out and then he’s gonna go all Glenn Close/Fatal Attraction on her.

September 19 2014, 10:09 AM






today I learned that if you want to slash someone’s tires, don’t slash all four; only slash three because if you slash all four their insurance will pay for it but if you only slash three they have to pay for it all out of pocket 


today on satan makes a blog post

Or you could slash 2 because their car only comes with 1 spare tire.

Yeah, but three tires cost more than two. 

This is the biggest load of shit I’ve ever read. Love, An Insurance Agent.

September 19 2014, 09:22 AM

Look, turning thirty is not that big a deal.

September 18 2014, 10:58 PM
I don't know if you're taking prompts atm but this thing just popped up in my mind and I thought I should leave it to someone who can write it in the best way. Outlaw Queen, of course, and taking a bath/shower together - if you can put fluff as well as smut it would be perfect (:


I hope you like this little one shot. Light smuttiness after the break.


He’s sore and tired and thinks so many things could be resolved by falling onto the soft blankets and pillows adorning Regina’s bed. But she’s insisted they take a hot shower first to get the dirt and blood washed away.

New day, different threat in Storybrooke. It’s something that keeps repeating, and he realizes idly, forehead against the tiled wall, that life has been anything but dull in the past year and a half. It’s no different than ogres and trolls or flying monkeys, it’s still about protecting Roland and the people he loves. But now there’s more, and as he feels Regina’s arms circle his waist under the warm water falling over them, he turns to face her.

There’s a cut to her cheek - nothing terrible, nothing that will even scar, and his thumb ghosts over it as his eyes travel her body. Hands skim her sides until his gaze finally stops on the slight swell to her belly, the one that no one else is privy to, the one he covers with his palm now as he takes a deep breath and lets it out.

"I’m fine," she says softly before he can get a word in, and his eyes close, because that isn’t the point.

"You might not have been. I’m not one to try and stifle you, Regina, but it isn’t only about you."

Her eyes meet his, and her fingers dance up and down his wrist. “You needed me. That’s what happened. And I’m fine.”

She isn’t wrong, he knows, he’d never seen a beast like this one, large and destructive as it stomped through the forest and ever closer to Storybrooke. A Cerberus, the Dark One had called it, and though it’s defeated now, still an omen. A guardian to the gates of hell is now dead and there’s much to understand, too much to try and figure out regarding its presence in a quiet Maine town, but for now he gathers her close, a quiet acquiesce to her remark. 

"I intend to keep you safe. To protect you."

"I’m perfectly capable of taking care of myself," comes her predictable reply.

"Then I’m taking care of our child."

She can’t argue with that, and he marvels at the tautness of her abdomen, at knowing there is a life under inches of her skin. Lips finding hers, he gently backs her to the wall, so that she is under the shower head and free of the spray, and he lifts, sighing as her legs lazily wrap around his hips. He has her, he is strong, and he needs her. To feel life beneath lips and tongue and hands, to make a strong heart race, to feel breath and hear affirmation of her here. With him.

(She is not Marian, and she will not be ill as Marian was, and he is telling himself as such over and over again.)

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September 18 2014, 10:53 PM





oops my hand slipped